PURE OPINION: CHARACTERS

"That's refreshing, a cop that drinks on duty." (Losing Streak)

Starsky treats Hutch badly (Black and Blue)
• Starsky won’t “fill in” Hutch on the case.
• Starsky won’t stay and talk to Hutch, but will talk to Mrs. Greene.
• Starsky alludes to and calls Meredith “Partner.”
• Starsky doesn’t thank Hutch for helping out in the end.
• Starsky doesn’t recognize pain Hutch was in after checking himself out of hospital.

Roger and Phil show what shits they really are (Avenger)
• Phil talks about his boring car.
• Roger talks and brags about his boring job.
• Phil agrees to some tea, but only if it doesn’t take too long.
• Roger demands some coffee, saying is “the least” Monique can do.
• Roger has sex with Monique and is ready to leave after less than 30 minutes after he gets there.
• Phil can’t commit to even one more night.
• Roger does something that makes Monique tell him she wants respect.

Luke Huntley is unappealing (Birds of a Feather)
• Luke has a huge ego, “Twenty-five years on the force and I got to diaper some punk?”
• For all Hutch means to him, he hasn’t kept in touch.
• Luke doesn’t get help from “appropriate channels,” and he makes really bad decisions.
• Luke has an explosive temper.
• He makes fun of Dobey’s weight, though he is egged on by Hutch.
• Luke has no remorse what so ever about shooting Jimmy.
• Luke drinks too much at the Pits, so much that Hutch has to chauffer him home in his own car.
• He says he only cares about two things--Doris and revenge.
• Luke takes advantage of Hutch and puts him in danger.
• Luke tells Hutch all he wanted from Hutch “was to pick up the pieces.”
• Luke wasn’t even smart enough to corner Reuben in a creative way.
• Luke isn’t around enough to notice dearth in bank account or that his wife doesn’t have her wedding ring any more.

Clues Terry Nash should have picked up on (Set-Up)
• Despite his weeks in the hospital, the fresh fruit on his dining room table looked fine.
• There was no stack of mail or newspapers either at his door nor mentioned by the legitimate doorman.
• Getting out of bed supposedly after two weeks isn’t a problem; he is out of that hospital in twenty minutes.
• “Dr. Stegner’s” timing of when his dad died, how many times they moved…doesn’t add up.
• Despite for being conscious and in bad shape, he has no medications or checkout procedures to follow.
• He can’t seem to remember much about his past.

Nick Starsky is bad news (Starsky’s Brother)
• Nick doesn’t want to be known as a cop. He doesn’t like Starsky’s trick with Marlene.
• Nick asks Starsky to flash badge at security. He does it purely from laziness and assumption.
• Nick schmoozes Dobey.
• Nick slaps Starsky’s face a little too hard and unexpectedly; watch Starsky’s body language.
• Nick goes shopping for duds right after he gets to Starsky’s apartment and spends too much money.
• Starsky and Nick end up arguing in front of their dates, alienating them.
• Starsky dances mainly to compete with Nick.
• Nick and his date cut past Starsky and his date on the dance floor.
• He won’t let Starsky host him, saying he’d “rather have a good time.”
• Nick tries to take the bed.
• He insults Starsky’s job, calling him a “head of lettuce.”
• He sings the Beatles tune, “I’m a Loser,” with the lyrics, “I’m not what I appear to be… ” Indeed.
• Nick won’t play the rhyming game with Huggy.
• Nick is faintly disdainful of Huggy.
• He complains about slow service at the Pits.
• Nick calls Huggy “Garcon.”
• Nick observes Starsky is tired, but doesn’t ask anything more. This pisses Starsky off.
• He has thugs as role models.
• Nick rationalizes his fencing as a Robin Hood move.
• Nick has poor morals, he doesn’t care.
• He doesn’t think pushing a “couple of kilos of weed” is that bad.
• He disses California’s laws in front of Hutch, suggesting all he will get is a parking ticket for selling dope.
• Nick only cares about having fun, not working that hard, having cash in his pocket and making a fast buck.
• He has a massive chip on his shoulder. He tells Starsky, “…You were never there for me.”
• Nick lies to Starsky about seeing Stryker.
• Nick lies to Starsky about staying out of trouble.
• Nick hustles Huggy and Hutch in pool.
• Nick doesn’t appear to reform. There is no mention of him feeling remorse about his Bay City disaster, only talk of him going back to his shiftless life.

Dan Slate’s response to Leslie’s attack feels all wrong (Strange Justice)
• He yells at the entire squad room about Leslie, in front of Leslie.
• He tells Leslie he is glad her mother isn’t around to suffer more regarding the rape.
• He gets after the “dummy” nurse for not having tissue.
• He assures only vengeance, but nothing else.
• He tells Biggs his daughter “was” a good girl.

Cassie is an unpleasant young woman (Strange Justice)
• She disses Lori.
• She tells Lori the ending of her television show.
• She doesn’t care if it is the “Birmingham Six” or the “Selma Six.”
• She may have a point about violence and woman, but is shrill.
• She won’t help Starsky and Hutch.

Kate Larrabee is a spoiled brat (Cover Girl)
• She would rather be dead than unattractive; she “can’t die that way.”
• She has so many antiques in her garage, she can’t park her car in it.
• She is snippy with her doctor.
• She takes advantage of Hutch’s position.
• She figured she live to 108 and look fabulous.
• She involves other people in her “assisted suicide,” not thinking of how other people can get hurt.
• She draws an answer out of Hutch, then calls it a “speech.”
• Hutch tells her to stay, when he senses danger at the door, she moves up three times
• Hutch tells her wise words, and she is embarrassed. Kate then plays the “please hold me” card.
• Kate has the gumption to think she can control her demise.

The car wash guy is bad news (Psychic)
• He micromanages.
• He doesn’t do any work himself. He just tells other people to get busy.
• He mispronounces “Mario” and “Pablo.” (Mary-O, Pay-Blow)
• He lies to Starsky and Hutch.
• He says Mexicans all look alike.
• He doesn’t care about Julio.
• Hutch can’t stand him.

Belle Kates is a good person, despite her situation (Hostages)
• Sweet Alice likes Belle. She says Belle has “always been straight” with her.
• Belle cooks a “mean pot of chili” and has “all the fixin’s”; she offers some to Ellie.
• Belle asks Ellie how she is feeling and wants her to lie down.
• Belle brings the phone to Ellie so she doesn’t have to get up.

Artie Solkin has sex with the boys, as well as using them for thievery and violence (Vendetta)
• Starsky refers to Artie as “Captain of the Belles,” “belles” being a slang word for a young, effeminate young male.
• Hutch calls Artie, “Faygeleh,” Yiddish for “little bird.” It is also slang for a gay person.
• Hutch refers to Tommy as Artie’s “boyfriend.”
• Solkin sits on the Tommy’s bed twice.
• Solkin suggests Tommy is glad to see him home.
• Tommy has a great fear of making Artie mad and has a great desire to make him happy.
• Artie’s “employees” are all young boys of roughly the same age.
• Tommy says, thinking he is talking to Artie, not Hutch, “You’re all I got.”
• Starsky and Hutch note Artie’s arrests were for aiding in the “Delinquency of a Minor.”
• Starsky refers to Artie as “Housemother of the Hotel Bremen.”

Joey is smarter than Tom, or at least not as dumb as he seems (Shootout)
• Joey makes an observant remark to Tom about reading a book twice.
• Joey suggests, “Maybe we should back out now while we still can.”
• Joey tells Robin, "Cheap tramp. Let me tell you something if you were any kind of a broad you’d stick with that guy whether he was a toad or not. She thought I fell for that. She really did.”

John Colby is a cold, cold man (Deadly Imposter)
• He whales way too much tar out of Tito.
• Colby refers to his supposed child as “the kid,” over and over again.
• Colby smiles when Huggy is in pain after getting attacked.
• He is such a good liar that Starsky and Hutch don’t suspect a thing.
• Colby goes to Michelle’s apartment and kills her when he could have thought of another solution.
• He kills off a whole family in Miami.
• He smiles after killing Harvey Russo.
• Colby doesn’t think anything of shooting a man in front of a child.

Starsky and Hutch can be really mean to Huggy
• Starsky and Hutch order food from him, but refuse it. They leave, calling the food cold. (Deadly Imposter)
• Hutch calls Huggy “The help.” (Little Girl Lost)
• Starsky and Hutch point out his expired liquor license after he won’t help them. (Collector)
• While they don’t do it on purpose, Starsky and Hutch get one of his best friends killed. (Targets 1)
• Starsky and Hutch order sandwiches. They leave before they eat them, leaving Huggy to wrangle with Dobey. (Targets 3)

Chris has fallen out of Starsky and Hutch’s favor (Heroes)
• Chris is relegated to the back seat.
• Starsky and Hutch don’t fawn over her anymore.
• Hutch doesn’t help her with the car seat.
• Starsky and Hutch won’t give her time to eat her lunch.

Four comments that unwitting highlight Starsky’s duplicity (Rosey Malone)
• Rosey Malone says, “Are you putting me on?”
• Rosey Malone says, “A man who appreciates the Huichol Indians can’t be all bad.” Starsky responds, “Just remember that.”
• Because Rosey is beautiful “inside and out,” Starsky says, “I may be in a whole lot of trouble.”
• Rosey Malone says, “Secrets? Everybody has secrets. Don’t you?” Starsky doesn’t answer the question.

Starsky and Hutch’s fine whines
• Hutch tells Starsky, “Don’t yell at me when I’m on the phone.” (Committee)
• Hutch whines about Starsky not helping him in the Pigeon Fight. (Kill Huggy Bear)
• Hutch whines about the lack of attention from the doctor at the hospital. (Fatal Charm)
• Hutch whines about the shopping cart behind Huggy’s. (Bait)
• Hutch whines that the cuffs are too small. (Texas Longhorn)
• Hutch whines to Starsky, “I know they’re in the first car. We wouldn’t be chasing them…” (Starsky and Hutch Are Guilty)
• Hutch whines, “I know, I saw,” when he can’t get a word in edgewise in the Iron Mike explanation. (Iron Mike)
• Starsky complains that Hutch gets “his fingers all over his food.” (Bust Amboy)
• Starsky whines to Hutch “I want to go home.” (Quadromania)
• Starsky whines to Hutch, tells Hutch to “push” as “I’m tired.” (Snowstorm)

Starsky and Hutch don’t trust/like Iron Mike (Iron Mike)
• Mike sits with the “crumb” Matt Coyle at a restaurant and takes an envelope from him.
• Mike contacts Starsky and Hutch for a job after a year of no contact, which Starsky and Hutch feel, is not a coincidence.
• During department store bust, there are five guys, not three like Iron Mike promised in his supposedly flawless bust.
• Starsky and Hutch see Mike talking to Matt Coyle again outside of Coyle’s Provisions and taking another envelope.
• He all but calls them babies when he discovers they pulled his sheets. Mike does it in the squad room as well.
• Mike asks them sarcastically if they “want to get back to real police work.”
• He also he asks sarcastically, “Think I’m settin’ you up?” but doesn’t wait for their answer.
• Hutch remembers Mike’s tactics “vividly,” which also seems to mean not positively.
• Mike scolds Hutch, “Don’t look like you’re going to salute” at Darcy’s Department Store.
• Hutch tells Starsky Mike’s attitude “stinks.”
• Mike claims his “conscience is as clear as any man’s,” which may or may not be a good thing.

Reasons not to like Thomas Callendar (Plague)
• He not only kills his contact on the roof, but viciously kicks his corpse.
• There seems to be a creepy connection between him and pre-teen Richie.
• He lies to Mrs. Yeager about his identity and puts her child in danger.
• He could have just hailed a cab and offered the driver big bucks instead of threatening to shoot him.
• Callendar most likely would not have come in to save Hutch or any of the other thousands of people.
• He is a miserable character who, after being told to leave the Yeager’s house, hangs out in nasty porn theaters.
• He is, after all, a hired hit man, responsible for misery all over the world.

The strange disconnect Starsky shows for Hutch’s neighborhood (Collector)
• Starsky calls it “your neighborhood.”
• Hutch has been trying to get Starsky down for a hot pastrami sandwich “for a month.”
• Mike Todesco calls Garras, “One of your local cronies.” (Collector)
• Starsky has to ask, “Joe who?” And Hutch explains. (Collector)
• Starsky says, “This is your turf, who’s the book.”
• Starsky and John-John don’t know each other.

Laura Stevens was not the one for Starsky (Committee)
• Laura insults Starsky’s clothes over and over again.
• Laura ditches Starsky at the fashion show.
• She gets Starsky’s name wrong.
• Hutch knows the joke about the red tennis shoe. Laura doesn’t.
• Laura leaves him standing with her clothes, which makes him a figure of fun at the fashion show.
• When talking about the fancy dinner with Starsky, she mentions everything but the nice company.
• Laura is embarrassed of Starsky when “The Times” editor sees them.
• Hutch didn’t like her.

Judith Kaufman was not the one for Hutch (Plague)
• She lives in another state.
• She appears to want to be his mother more than a lover, referring to his vulnerable body parts and saying he looks like a little boy.
• She does a cowardly thing, flirting with him behind glass, where he is “safe.”
• Judith tells Hutch, “It’s what underneath” the hospital gown that counts. She then admits she wouldn’t say these things to him if he weren’t going to be dead in two days.
• When she is in the ward with the suffering Hutch, she gives him no comfort. She doesn’t talk to him, meet his eyes or touch him unless to draw blood.
• When Hutch presses her on her feelings from inside the ward, she leaves.
• Hutch calls her a coward to her face at the airport, not the best way to get her to stay.
• She seems awfully fond of Dr. Meredith.

Kathy Marshall is one stand-up chick. (Fatal Charm)
• She loves to dance.
• She offers to help Diana.
• She doesn’t have a problem diving right in and using her hands on cleaning up cold pasta.
• She doesn’t become upset when Hutch steps on her.
• She is quick to include Diana in a foursome.
• She doesn’t go too crazy when drink is spilled on her.
• She has a fun loving spirit and doesn’t appear to inspire jealousy between Starsky and Hutch.
• Both Starsky and Hutch like her.

St. Terry might have worked out with Starsky
• She says, “I know you. I know what you have to do in your life.” (Starsky’s Lady)
• She says, “You’re my best friend,” five times. She must like Starsky. (Starsky’s Lady)
• She has a good job and likes children. (Starsky’s Lady)
• She says, “You don’t have to promise me.” (Starsky’s Lady)
• Altruistic Terry asks Starsky at the hospital, “Are you all right?” Starsky says she is mixed up, as she is the one in bed. (Starsky’s Lady)
• She says, “I’ll be there whenever you show up.” (Starsky’s Lady)
• She asks Hutch to love Starsky. (Starsky’s Lady)
• Terry encourages him to stay on the police force. (Starsky’s Lady)
• Starsky has shopped for clothes with two adults, Hutch and Terry. This must be some sort of litmus test. (Little Girl Lost, Starsky’s Lady)
• Terry tells Starsky she loves him four times. (Starsky’s Lady)
• Terry has a sense of humor. (Starsky’s Lady)
• She says she doesn’t want Starsky to change. (Starsky’s Lady)
• Starsky says that after Terry died, he “wasn’t sure he had enough strength to remain on this earth.” (Partners)
• Hutch and Terry snuggle in the Torino in the front seat with Starsky. (Starsky’s Lady)
• She is the only woman Starsky has ever asked to marry. (Starsky’s Lady)
• She apparently has no family. This will allow Starsky to continue spending the holidays with Hutch. (Starsky’s Lady)
• Starsky is never shown shouting at her and shaking her by her shoulders. (Rosey Malone, Blindfold, Running)

The relationship between Emily and Starsky is squicky (Blindfold)
• Starsky kisses her on the mouth before she knows it is him who shot her.
• Starsky makes a joke in poor taste, telling her in front of Sharon, to “keep you clothes on,” when he takes her photograph.
• His entire relationship with her is based on a lie.
• Starsky takes advantage of her vulnerability (newly blinded, no family, one measly friend).
• Starsky manhandles her and tells her what to do and how to feel, much more to assuage his own guilt than for her benefit.
• His relationship with Emily is based on making her best friend, Sharon, lie to her.
• While somewhat empathetic, Starsky’s “hour of blindness” has nothing to do with Emily or being blind, but everything to do with his ego.

Lizzie Thorpe, while a good dancer, is a pretty ineffectual cop (Discomania)
• She doesn’t ask that many questions at Fever,
• She leaves her drink unattended.
• She leaves her little purse, with her police shield in it, unattended by Tony.
• While she may be a little dizzy, she can’t manage to do anything to fend off Marty Decker.
• She walks to the car, to dizzy to really drive.
• She turns down Hutch’s offer of back up.
• She, despite being a highly trained police sergeant, doesn’t even make the least effort at self-defense, or apprehending Tony, despite multiple opportunities.

Simonetti is an ass
• He goads Hutch at the initial interview.
• He makes a lewd comment about Van’s corpse.
• He gives confidential information to Dr. Morgan as a brag.
• He crudely goads Hutch in front of Dobey and Starsky.
• He has an icky voice.
• He orders Dryden around.

Despite Hutch’s claim to Anna he is good at his job, he isn’t in the case with her (Body Worth Guarding)
• He does a crappy search of her hotel room
• Displaying his observation talents, he runs into a glass door.
• He has a poor handling of interpersonal relations with his protectee, both in his initial hostility and in his personal involvement.
• He is careless with his gun, pointing it at Starsky at one point.
• He can’t get his gun in out of his holster when he hears the thud in the hallway.
• Hutch draws on the bellman with the newspaper.
• He is not prepared for work when Starsky arrives to relieve him.
• He goes to the door without his gun and Starsky has to hand it to him.
• Hutch does no work whatsoever in solving the case.
• He stays up all night, which would make him useless the next day.
• One would assume that he wasn’t watching or listening for trouble when he was having sex with Anna.

Lola should be reprogrammed and employed by the Bay City Interrogation Olympian Team (Bounty Hunter)
• “Look Mr.. You either put up or your kid stays in the slammer.”
• “You want to shop this deal, fine.”
• “Only don’t come back here when you find out that I offered you the best opportunity in town.”
• “I mean, I don’t even know why I am wasting my time with you.”
• “I don’t want to write this ticket.”
• “So you make up your mind, buster, and you make it up fast.”

K.C. McBride’s open mind (Quadromania)
• K.C. propositions Starsky, knowing he is a man. He answers her, thinking she is a man and says he “Doesn’t go that route,” meaning he is straight.
• Starsky hasn’t turned around, and K.C. thinks he is saying he is gay. She says she is glad he “Doesn’t keep it in the closet like other guys.”
• Starsky turns, realizes she is a woman and asks her on a date. K.C. then assumes Starsky is bisexual and remarks about him “changing his politics.”
• K.C. goes out with him anyway, as she “doesn’t mind a few kinks in the road of life.”

Hutch’s firm non-committal with Diana (Fatal Charm)
• To Diana’s suggestion they stay at her place for dinner and sex is, Hutch’s reply is “Whatever.”
• To Diana’s admission she followed him to bar is, “I guess I should be flattered.”
• To Starsky and Kathy’s suggestion of a foursome, Hutch’s reply is a pallid “Sure. Sounds, uh, sounds great.”

Nancy Blake’s marriage is doomed from the start, aside from the obvious choice of groom (Terror on the Docks)
• Aside from Starsky and Hutch and her mother, Nancy appears to have little support or friends.
• Billy can’t get the time of the wedding on Saturday correct.
• Billy either is really, really late or never shows for dinner.
• Father Delacourt is late.
• Father Delacourt mistakes Starsky and Hutch for the groom.
• Hutch is the one who snuggles and comforts Nancy, rather than Billy, after the truck “accident.”
• Margaret plays a funeral dirge by mistake.
• Mrs. Blake claims not to know anything about Billy.
• Mrs. Blake cries during the rehearsal.

Appealing things about John-John the Apple (Collector)
• He gives the old lady her cane back and is nice about it.
• He tries to talk “Heather” out of getting money from Jack.
• He helps a young girl “in trouble.”
• He says he doesn’t want to take Joe’s money anymore, because Joe is in over his head.
• He greets people on the street and chats up folks who buy his stuff.
• He delivers newspapers to cars.
• He makes that funny joke about his place not being a library, but a “losing proposition.”

Starsky’s error in reading Hutch and Diana’s body language (Fatal Charm)
• Starsky totally ignores Hutch’s obvious discomfort when suggesting a foursome.
• He doesn’t see the weird vibes with Diana, the curt “I don’t dance” and the odd stare at the disco.
• He gives Hutch bad advice about “reading her the riot act” and splitting.
• Starsky doesn’t take Hutch’s fear of Diana after her vandalism seriously, despite the scene at Metro.
• Even the next day, seeing the mess at Hutch’s apartment doesn’t alert him.

Perhaps Candy shouldn’t marry Buzzy Boone (Golden Angel)
• Buzzy plays the ponies, “Sometimes gets over his head.”
• He eats too much. Observe the four hamburgers on his plate at the Pits.
• He has a physically dangerous job.
• Camille will probably fool the hospital staff, score a 72% on the Wisconsin Multi-Facet Index Test and come back to kill him.
• There’s not much of a future in wrestling, by his own admit, and he doesn’t know what else to do.

Freddie, the calm, dieting, cheese-denying henchman is the best henchman
• Freddie makes Stryker answer the phone, even though Freddie is closer to it.
• Freddie reads the newspaper while Stryker waters his plants, making him compatible and easy company.
• Stryker asks Freddie’s advice, and Freddie gives it as though this was expected.
• Freddie has a calm drawling voice.
• Freddie has a god-awful, yet strangely appealing, brown and white accented Texan jacket and bolo tie.
• And in the end, he screws things up by fluffing the Huggy Bear thing. This is good for Starsky and Hutch.